Training Gone Bad... or Not?

    When I say I'm trying to reduce the stigma around mental illness, especially Bipolar Disorder, I am also including myself in that. Sometimes I forget and/or can't believe that's what is going on with me, and it makes me feel pretty bad about myself. Especially when other people refer to mentally ill people in a negative way, or call them "crazy" (I have already mentioned I don't like that word).

    Yesterday at work I watched a training video on mental illnesses, with an emphasis on how they affect people experiencing homelessness. It focused on Schizophrenia, Bipolar Disorder, and Personality Disorders. It was from an "outsiders" perspective and was more statistical and generalizing, but I suppose that makes sense, since the audience is intended to be people who work in a social services type job. Even with that in mind, it didn't make me feel great.

    Going in to the video, I didn't love that my personal affliction was being analyzed in a way that made it sound like a problem. Like a "how to deal with these kinds of crazy people" kind of way. First the presenter talked about how much of the general public and how many unhoused people are diagnosed Bipolar Disorder. Then, he went over a brief summary of symptoms (without differentiating between Bipolar I and Bipolar II), focusing on how problematic the manias can be. But what really grinds my gears, is the presented BRIEFLY mentioned that there are in fact three (technically, depending on who you ask) kinds of Bipolar: I, II, and III aka cyclothymic disorder. He specifically said NOT to call Bipolar II a "lesser version" of Bipolar I and then goes on to say that "but if you look at the symptoms, it certainly seems like a lesser version..." RAGE! "FLAMES! FLAMES ON THE SIDE OF MY FACE!"

    So by now my guard is up and my feathers are ruffled. To end the presentation, the host talked about handling encounters with a mentally ill patron, and it just made me feel... crappy. I know that I have yet to experience a mood swing so bad that I actually act out towards an undeserving employee somewhere, but still. I felt kind of offended, to be honest - like I wasn't really a person worthy of any dignity. Maybe that's an overreaction, just like the presenter said I apparently am capable of. But you know what? I think feeling this way will actually come in handy if I ever have an encounter with someone who is struggling with a mental illness of their own. I might understand where they are coming from a little more, and better know how to treat them - with the same dignity and respect everyone deserves.

    Shit. I think that training actually worked... 👻